Alright, I know this is more like a #Groupthink thing

"El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First!" (lightningzone) 09/09/2013 at 08:31 • Filed to: None

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But I can't post there, so I'm gonna tell you guys, I'm in shock.
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Last night, I was cleaning the attic of my gf's home(because her dad is in a business trip to Asia and the thing has to be clean, in order for her family to sell the house and move to a house that's got a pool and because she is such a great gf), she was still back at my place gossiping with a friend of hers. I found a box, a w0dden box, that was nailed. I am a curious guy, I got a crowbar and I opened that box, inside, it had 4 smaller cardboard boxes, 3 were empty, but the 4th had a leather covered box in it, the box was locked, I forced the lock, and here comes the strange part, it was full of my gf's mother(let's call her Jane), pictures, videotapes, letters, toys and some more recent pics and dvd's, with her occasional cougar style nights out, Jane was a stripper and a high end escort, before she met her husband, and now she is a closet cougar. The goody good wife, mother and republican voter has a darker side, sluttier side and that made me thinking at all kind of things. She was bringing me a snack, when she saw me looking at her naughty stuff. She let a short scream get away from her lungs, and dropped the plate with the coke glass and the Doritos, making a small mess on the floor I just cleaned, thanks a lot.

Then she started crying, begging me not to tell anything to anyone, she got on her knees, and before I could say anything, starting do the thing she was so good at, in her escort years. It was unreal, my possible future mother in law, giving me a bj with dt. After doing her thing, with my milk still on her lips, she gave me a slutty kiss, saying "Is this enough to keep your mouth shut?". I was like WTF? Why do are hiding this? I think your family would've understand you, lying is not the answer, especially when you try to stop your daughter from being a rebel anymore(I will make sure she stays that way, hehe)? Then I stopped for a few seconds, and looked into her eyes, and I started to understand. Sometime, you need to reset your life. I told her that I don't blame her, and that if I were in her place, I would've probably did the same thing. She was so happy that I wasn't judging her anymore, she jumped on me and started kissing and licking my face. I told her to stop, but that only made her continue, there's no way to stop a cougar. We had sex for almost two hours, I think that we both enjoyed it, and before leaving she told me that there's a lot more where.that came from, if I keep my mouth shut. When I got home, my gf was almost asleep, on my bed, I crawled next to her, telling her that I'm exhausted and there won't be any action tonight, I was sleeping the next second.

Now, my gf is still asleep, and I'm thinking, what to do? I don't want to lie her, and if I'm doing it with her mom, is it really as bad ass cheating her with some sleazy street whore? This is one of those cases when telling the truth is worse than being a liar and a cheater. I know, it sounds like a crappy soap opera, but some soap operas, are inspired by life.

Also, if any of you can post on GT, I would appreciate if you shared this there, Jezzies can give some good advices.

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 09/09/2013 at 08:37

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Dear Oppositelock Forum,

I've read about things like this and never thought that they were real, but you'll never believe what happened to me last night...

TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 09/09/2013 at 08:40

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Uhhhh...

El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire 09/09/2013 at 08:41

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You're not helping.

Firewrx234 > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 09/09/2013 at 08:44

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Firewrx234 > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 09/09/2013 at 08:44

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ncasolowork2 > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 09/09/2013 at 08:44

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What book did you read this in? There's no way this can be true because there's nobody dumb enough to crowbar open a box nailed shut and pry open a lock.

Mattbob > ncasolowork2 09/09/2013 at 08:47

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also, call me sexist, but the probability of a woman nailing a box shut are extremely low. Nailing is more of a guys thing.

El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! > ncasolowork2 09/09/2013 at 08:49

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I don't read books like that, lol. Also it appears that I am dumb enough, since I was supposed to get rid of all the junk stored there, why not take a closer look at it ?

Mattbob > Mattbob 09/09/2013 at 08:49

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If it is true, Don't have anything to do with the mother, and be honest with the girl. You are a turd if you don't.

TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. > Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire 09/09/2013 at 09:00

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Jezzies can give some good advices

This broke my bullshit meter, sorry.

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. 09/09/2013 at 09:01

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lol

El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! > TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. 09/09/2013 at 09:22

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Actually, they did gave me some good advices, in the past, they're not all feminist zombies who dream to tie up all the men in the world, and send them on Jupiter.

TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 09/09/2013 at 09:29

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highmodulus > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 09/09/2013 at 09:31

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Ravey Mayvey Slurpee Surprise > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 09/09/2013 at 10:09

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AbigGRNboot > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 09/09/2013 at 10:12

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Because the internet is where I hide all the things I don't want anyone to know.

El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! > AbigGRNboot 09/09/2013 at 10:37

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That's why I don't give names and places, it is a way of telling people, without getting into details.

El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! > Mattbob 09/09/2013 at 10:42

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That seems the right thing to do, but I cannot think at the other option too, if I shut up, I will still be happy with my gf, and have access to bunga bunga(to cite Italy's former PM) with her mom, anytime I want. I know, I can be really cynical, sometimes.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 09/09/2013 at 16:42

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Did spaghetti then fall out of your pocket?

The Stampi > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 09/09/2013 at 20:14

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Stand back guys, I got this.

What kind of cars do the two women in question drive?

El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! > The Stampi 09/09/2013 at 23:57

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Gf drives an Audi A3, her mom drives a Cadillac SRX. But I don't see how is this relevant.